Colours of my World

Flashforward is a show about the entire world having a two minute glimpse into their future. Everyone has a flashforward of the same date. It's a wonderful show about free will and fate; about choices and nihilism; about philosophy and theology; about love and sacrifice.

Characters grapple with knowing what their future is. Some try to fight it, whilst others sink into hopelessness, believing the sands are running out. Time is but a cruel device, painfully ushering in their moment of misery.

What about my future?

Sometimes I'd like a flashfoward. I'm impatient and want to know if certain dreams will become reality. But most of me is glad of the unknown. A year ago I had a very different vision for the future. It was a vision built on uneven ground and unsafe foundations. It was a vision of naive and also ignorant aspirations. It was not wrapped in the integrity and dream-like qualities which usually govern my life. I am glad it never came into being.

Now?

Now I have a different vision. It is blurry and hazy, but in a beautiful way. It is like hundreds of colours of paint being poured into a tank of water.

The colours float and drift and merge. The sunlight reflects off the water and enhances the stunning spectrum. There is no clear picture; it is enchanting chaos. But begin to look closely. Look at the paint filled water as though you were a child. As if you are lying on your back looking at the sky and seeing shapes in the clouds.

As you stare at the tank you start to see different shapes and images. That's how I see my future; beautifully unclear but starting to make out various, enthralling images.

I'm in a moment of hope and expectation. My creative side is flourishing and I hope it will evolve into a full-time pursuit.

I'm also connecting with people in a new way. Someone has particularly astounded me and it's so wonderful. It's like slotting pieces together and then stepping back to slowly see the bigger picture. It's hopeful.

And in all this I am getting clarity about me. And I have the dream-like hope for my life. It's pure and full of imagination.