Tuesday 24 May 2011

Collided Future

We can predict our days and weeks and months, but we should not be so arrogant. I had a good idea about how my week was going to go and then it all got flipped upside down, shaken around, wiggled and shaken again. So actually, I am now left feeling rather dazed and confused.

Am I prepared for the future? No. I am too involved in my own romantic fantasy. The reality hits me and it hurts bad. I want to hurt myself because I am so fucking ignorant to the realities of real life. I want something which only exists in the small frame of my mind. Honestly, who actually believes in the sweeping power of love? Who actually believes in the passing power of enchantment taking hold of you and grasping you and making your life something incredible?

I have seen my life today and realised I am living in a fantasy world. I saw something which could have been and, wowzers, it will never be. Ever. Ever.

I will not be defined by my disappointments. No.

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